Hospitality on a Budget — The Bring-Your-Own-Lunch Playgroup

Hospitality on a budget is the story I want to tell you today, because two of the biggest reasons I hear for not having people over are “I have little kids and it’s too chaotic,” and “I don’t have any money to feed anybody.” Both of those are valid. I lived both of them at the same time. So here’s what I did about it.

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Story time — pull up a chair. Or keep reading below.

Hospitality on a Budget Started With Being Lonely

When I was a young mom with little kids, I was desperate for female companionship. Friends. Other moms I could actually talk to. And I figured out pretty quick that nobody was going to knock on my door and hand that to me. I needed to take the initiative and get it going myself.

I am not the only mama who has felt that way. Harvard’s Making Caring Common project surveyed Americans about loneliness and found that more than half of mothers with young children reported serious loneliness. More than half. If you are home with little ones and feeling cut off from the world, you are in a very big club — and most of the members are just waiting for somebody else to make the first move.

So I made it. I started a playgroup with the ladies I knew from church who had kids the same age as mine. If you go to church, you already have a church family, and that is an excellent place to start something like this. But if you don’t, think about where you already see other young moms — a little mommy class, story time at the library, anything like that. That is a good place to make some connections.

Every Friday, Everybody Brought Their Own Lunch

I had no money to feed a houseful of people every week. So I didn’t. I just started a very simple playgroup.

Every Friday, the mamas brought their kids over to my house, and everybody packed their own lunch. We did not provide for each other. The kids played with whatever toys I had, everybody ate their own lunches, and we just visited and talked. That was it. That was the whole thing.

And when the weather got warmer, we morphed it into meeting at a park — a different local park — and let the kids run outside. We still ate our own lunches right there at the park with our kids. Same idea, just more sunshine.

What Those Playgroup Years Gave Me

I tell you, those playgroup years got me — and I think some of those other moms too — through some crazy, isolating times. It was just so great to have another mom to share experience with. I’d bring up whatever had been going on that week, and somebody would say, “Oh my goodness, yes, my kid is doing that too, here’s how we handled it.” Or it was some other life issue entirely. There was just a lot of comradeship in getting to be together.

I made some really strong friendships with those moms at a time when I really needed them. And it did not matter one bit what anybody’s budget was. Everybody was good to go anyway.

No Little Kids? Hospitality on a Budget Still Works

By the same token, if you don’t have small children, I would still do something just like this. Bring your own lunch is the whole trick. If you’re an older lady, invite some older ladies from church, tell everybody to bring their own lunch, and then — I don’t know — play cards or something like that. It is that simple.

People will jump on it. They are still excited to have a reason to connect with somebody, get out of the house, and go do something. It does not have to be elaborate. It does not have to cost money. It does not have to be major entertaining. Hospitality on a budget can be as small as a table, a few chairs, and everybody’s brown paper bag.

So for whatever it’s worth, there’s another little hospitality tip for you. Don’t let little kids or a tight budget keep you from having people over — from getting people into your life, around your table, in your home. I don’t think you’ll ever regret it.

Hospitality on a Budget FAQ

Is it rude to ask guests to bring their own lunch?

Not one bit, as long as you say so when you invite them. Nobody in my playgroup ever felt shortchanged — they were just glad to have somewhere to go and somebody to talk to. Saying it up front actually takes pressure off everybody, because nobody has to wonder whether they owe you a dinner back.

What does hospitality on a budget look like with little kids?

For me it looked like a living room full of toddlers playing with whatever toys I had, and a bunch of tired mamas eating sandwiches they packed themselves. That is it. The kids are the entertainment, and the visiting is the point.

Where do I find other moms to invite if I don’t go to church?

Look wherever you already see other moms with kids the same age — a mommy class, library story time, the park you already go to. You only need two or three to get started. Somebody has to be the one to say “want to come over Friday?” and it might as well be you.

How often should a playgroup meet?

Ours met every Friday, and having the same day every week made it easy — nobody had to plan anything or send a bunch of texts. When it got warmer, we just moved it to a park. Pick a day that works and keep it.

What if my kids are grown?

Do the exact same thing without the toys. Invite a few ladies over, everybody brings their own lunch, and play cards or just sit and talk. People are still hungry for a reason to get out of the house and be with somebody, at every age.

More Crowd-Friendly Hosting Ideas You’ll Love

• Hospitality vs Entertaining — There’s Always Room at My Table — the difference between impressing somebody and actually seeing them.
• Hospitality in an Imperfect Home — My Most Humiliating Story — the day a guest walked in on garbage across every couch, and why I kept having people over anyway.
• Meals to Take to Someone — The Four I Always Bring (and a Printable) — when you can’t have them over, you can still take the table to them.

Hospitality on a Budget — About Stephanie Longstreth

Stephanie Longstreth is the home cook, mom, and storyteller behind StephanieCooksForACrowd.com. She cooks for a family of seven in Florida — five kids, two cats, and one husband who appreciates a good meal. Four of her children came home through adoption, and family stories are woven into everything she makes and shares. Find her crowd-friendly recipes, weekly meal plans, and real family life on TikTok, Instagram, YouTube, and Pinterest @stephaniecooksforacrowd.