The Hill I Will Die On: No Chocolate, No Noodles in My Chili

The Hill I Will Die On: no chocolate, no noodles in my chili — and I have the backstory to prove it. When Jason and I were a very young preacher and his wife, we packed up and moved to Louisville, Kentucky, full of excitement and ready to make new friends. Someone organized a chili potluck, and y’all, I was SO excited. I brought my best chili. I had high hopes. And when we walked in and I started lifting crockpot lids, every single one had noodles in it. Every. Single. One. I turned to Jason and said, “I thought this was supposed to be a chili potluck???” I was in shock. I think I’m still in shock, honestly. But it got worse. Someone took us to Skyline Chili — which, if you’re not from that region, is a Cincinnati institution — and not only did it have noodles, it also had chocolate. Chocolate. In chili. I cannot condone this. I will not condone this. These are my hills and I am dying on both of them today.

Now listen — I want to be fair here. I know there are people who love Skyline Chili. I know there are entire regions of this country where noodles in chili is just what you do. I have family and friends who would fight me on this. And I love them anyway.

But I have tried both. I gave it a real shot. Noodles in chili, chocolate in chili — I approached both with an open mind and a hopeful fork. And I am here to tell you: no. Just no. Chili is a sacred thing. It has beans (yes, beans, and yes I will also die on THAT hill another day). It has meat. It has spices. It has tomato sauce. It does not need pasta. It does not need a candy bar.

I grew up in a house where chili was chili. You made a pot, you let it simmer low and slow, and you served it with cornbread or crackers and maybe a little shredded cheese on top. That’s it. That’s the recipe. That’s the whole thing.

The noodles situation in Louisville was my first real culture shock as a preacher’s wife — and I say that with all the love in the world for Louisville, Kentucky and every person who lives there. You are wonderful people who make a chili-adjacent dish and call it chili, and we can still be friends. But I’m not changing my position.

And Skyline? Bless your hearts. I truly mean that. You have a passionate fanbase and a loyal following and I respect the hustle. But the chocolate is a hard no from me. Hard. No.

This is The Hill I Will Die On. Both hills, actually. No noodles. No chocolate. Real chili only. Who’s with me — and who’s about to come argue in the comments? Because disagreement is not just welcome around here — it’s encouraged. 😂 What’s YOUR chili hill?

The Hill I Will Die On: No Chocolate, No Noodles in My Chili — About The Hill I Will Die On

“The Hill I Will Die On” is Stephanie’s series where she shares her passionate — and sometimes hilariously opinionated — takes on all things food and cooking. These are the culinary hills she will absolutely die on. No apologies. No backing down. Just good food, strong opinions, and a lot of laughter from our kitchen in Florida. Fair warning — Stephanie takes her food opinions seriously, but not herself. These posts are meant to make you laugh, maybe make you argue, and hopefully make you hungry. Disagreement is not just welcome — it’s encouraged. What’s YOUR hill?